Beyond the Oyster Juice

Something old, something new

Well - something new at least.

Since you're here, tell me what you think about these 4 Holiday shirts that will be shipping.

First up, the 12/23/2012 in Midnight Blue. (12/23/2012 - the Mayan calendar end of the world. Yep, this is the shirt that everyone will be wearing when the heavy stuff comes down. I've pre-ordered millions to make sure we have enough) It comes in Sunrise Orange too.

 

What about this one? The El Chapin. It's about time I started making a shirt that featured the legendary Pineapple Skull and Crossbones Logo. On a Sunrise Orange background no less.

We're tossing in some Mad Gringo solids this season too. And they are everything you would imagine. Almost classy, but messed up enough to cause a casual observer to note, "looks like you had a laundry accident." You can reply by telling them, "I never launder. Or shower. Or whatever."

This comes in Midnight Blue, Sunrise Orange, and Red Dirt.

 

One last button up shirt for you to peek at. The Michelada. Named for the drink that I thought I discovered, battled and conquered. The swirls are what were in my eyes when I perused my camera phone the next day. (who thought it would be a good idea to give me a camera phone?)

 

And a sneak peek at one of the Tshirts we're releasing too. Hmm. . . let's see what you think of this computer generated pic. (the tshirts are much softer in person) It's the Mad Gim Banquet which poses the question: Is Gim skinny because he eats skeleton fish or is Gim a skeleton because he, um, didn't eat the fish. Whatever. You know what I mean. This shirt will come in Mustard, Brick, Blue Jean and Orange.

That's what I have for you.

Hopefully that wasted a few minutes from your work day. We need to get that time wasted metric up, remember?

Go slow.

MG

Naps in the news

Mad Gringo's need sleep. 

Lots of it. 

Some mad gringo's fly planes: 

Northwest pilots insist they were not napping

(I know it says they weren't napping, but come on. It's cold up there.) 

And here is another reason to move to Australia:

Employers wake up to idea of power naps

You'll have to head down under for that benefit, especially if you live in New York State.

Mad cave bust in Albany

(Another reason not to take a government job)

And a beautiful sunrise from Oracoke Island, NC:

One last thing. All of our stuff on the madgringo.com website is on sale. 

Don't get caught napping. 

(sorry, couldn't resist)

Go slow. 

MG

The many sunrises of Sandbridge

As the rain methodically removes all of the foliage in my neighborhood, Wild Bill helps me keep my eyes on the prize. 

Check out this brief sunrise photo montage:

 

 

While uploading these, I started to think "What's Rox been up to?" I love it when Rox and Shane put together the video's of the ocean. Put it on repeat while you veg out in your cube and rock your inner mad gringo to sleep. 

Go slow, amigo. 

I'm heading out to goof off.

MG

400 Miles

Aloha!

 

I haven't seen the sun for nearly 2 weeks now. I think it peeked out at a kids football game but as I removed my hood to absorb it's warmth I was dealt a 30 mph north wind. It's October, man. I thought the Banana Belt was immune from these temperatures?

 

So, you may be thnking, if it's so cold, why are you so cheery? Are unproductive levels up in the last week? Was there a sale on coconut buttons in Bali? Is it that laughing coconut guy on your desk?

 

No, no and no.

 

It's the Slow Rover.

 

Remember the beat up old Range Rover I rescued from the junk yard? The one I wanted to bring to life so I could load it with tropical shirts and travel this great land? The one you suggested names for and Slow Rover won? (somehow edging out Gilbert)

 

I know, that was months ago but guess what? It came to life! It filled my driveway with fluids. It sounds like a bus. It left me stranded once. But I'm not bitter. That's part of the game.

 

And I have nowhere to be, really.

 

Well, today it passed 400 miles. Amazingly, it has not run over any small animals. And the musty smell has been replaced by the smell of Mango Lip Balm. (the kind made with organic hemp seed oil - as opposed to fake hempseed oil)

 

To celebrate, we're having an October clearance sale. And for you all, we're taking an additional 20% off these sale prices when you use this coupon:

 

SLOWROVER

 

The new stuff is coming in and the warehouse has to be cleared. So get busy.

 

Order this weekend and we'll include a lip balm or two. My dog thinks they taste yummy.

 

Go slow.

 

MG

Sunrise with dogs

Wild Bill has taken to showing us every sunrise. Either trying to prove that he's an early riser or it's the same photo series repeated and he's getting a kick out of making me jealous. 

Today's entry has the pooches. They look happy. 

Louie the Beagle would never sit there as I took a picture. Unless she was sedated. 

Which can be arranged. 

Go slow. 

MG

Tiki Tender drives the presses forward!

TikiTender. 

Could he be the best bartender in the world? 

http://www.news-journalonline.com/

We love his hat. 

Go slow. 

MG

Sunrise, Sandbridge VA

Wild Bill sent this along for you to enjoy with your coffee this morning:

It's Race Day for him. Sunrise in Sandbridge VA on Backbay Hei Hei Race Day. 

Me? 

I'm looking out the window at snow, yes snow, in the big Island of Omahahu. 

Back to bed. 

Go slow. 

MG

Recent Mad Gringo Sightings

In case the world didn't know it yet, Mad Gringo is everywhere. And yet nowhere.

Deep, eh?

Mad Gringos in Ft Lauderdale:

The Dundee Banker Boys with Nebraska Head Coach Bo Pellini:

 

Mad Lorie's hubby wearing the local garb:

Tikitender showing off his considerable skills - taking a picture sideways.

(sorry about that - I'm in a hurry) and the Mad Gringo in Spain.

And yes, I'm pretty sure Mad Mario sent this to show me he was at a topless beach.

Go slow.

Mario.

MG

Disturbing news on my table

Mad Gringo is fired up.

 

It doesn't happen often, but when it does, look out.

 

This arrived on my desk today:

 

I couldn't believe it.

 

I called Mad Stacey and Mad Susan over.

My voice rising, I thundered, "Are you wasting 1.7 hours a day at Mad Gringo!?!" I was livid. Seeing red.

 

"No, no, no," they said. Trying to assure me they weren't wasting 1.7 hours a day. 

 

"We waste much more than that," they said.

 

Finally. Some good news!

 

A little history here: Mad Gringo waged a war on the powerful necktie lobby from 2007 through 2008 and escaped with only minor cuts and bruises.

2010 brings another foe: productivity.

 

The goal? Get unproductive time each day up from 1.7 hours to a respectable 3 hours a day. 

 

It will be a process, not an event so buckle up.

We'll start with some small skirmishes.

Our weapon of choice? Tshirts.

 

Your marching orders:

*Go to http://www.madgringo.com

*click on the Tshirts link on the left side navigation

*sort the category by your size - anything we have in your size will show up

*pick one tshirt (you can double check what color's available in the "click here to view availability" link)

*put it into your shopping cart

 

*at the top of your shopping cart, put in this promotional code: UNPRODUCTIVE

*the price will be reduced by 33%. (the closest I could get to a Buy 2 Get 1 Free Coupon)

*continue checkout and wait 5-7 days

 

*5-7 days later, open your box and take out your new tshirt

Grab the Rum, Orange Juice, Pineapple Juice, Lime Juice and Grenadine and start working on that Planter's Punch recipe.

 

On a Wednesday.

 

Afternoon.

You need to have this completed by Friday 10/2/2009 at midnight.

Gringo's orders.

 

 

There. I'm off the ledge now. 

 

Go slow.

 

MG

 

State of the Gringo

Greetings!

In this issue:

* Bad Gringo

* Gringos in the news

* Missing Pictures

* Dance with Mad Gringo

* Salida

*****************************

BAD GRINGO

*****************************

My sister-in-law has been threatening to out me for the last few months. Consider this a pre-emptive strike. 

Mad Gringo has not been "going slow". 

It may surprise those of you that have tried to get anything from us, but behind all of these bits and bytes there is a business trying to get out. 

I know, I know. Mad Gringo wants to go slow and wander between South Padre and Antigua but we haven't figured out how to do it sans income. So, we try to sell a few shirts here and there. 

Anyway, back to my sister-in-law. We went up to Door County WI with them this summer. 

That's the Off to See the Lizard tropical shirt. (the glare is from my white belly)

In between the late nights and lazy days, she kept catching me on what the kiddles call the "addict-a-phone". At the Renaissance Festival in Minneapolis this weekend (Free Guinness Day) she actually took a picture on me trying to type something out. Right in front of Puke and Snot.

The worst part? It was a Saturday. 

So I'm coming clean. I haven't been going slow. What have I done for the last 8 weeks? Check it out.

I did find a great pic of the kind bus with a Mad Gringo sticker.

I did take some last pictures of the warehouse before we moved it.

I went to a trade show in Chicago and met some nice women from Rhode Island who were in town for an infectious disease conference or something. We took this picture from the hotel bar.

I got stuck in traffic while leaving Skokie. (Mad Gringo hates traffic)

I packed my bags and went to Orlando for a while. (one bag, 3 tropical shirts, one pair of shorts, a swimsuit and toothbrush)

Mad Tom, Head Bottle Washer for the Southeast was waiting for me. (check out the El Chapin tropical shirt! Coming in November)

I went to a party where at least 5 people were wearing Mad Gringo shirts:

I stayed too late. Things got fuzzy.

Went to Vegas and was serenaded by Elvis. (You can't make it out, but the blur in front is Mad Roy in the Excavation tropical shirt. Available in November)

Went to Minneapolis to talk some sense into Bert Favre. (the Packer fans have tshirts that say "We'll never forget you Bert" - love it.)

Figured out that people love my mannequin, Buddy. (sporting the Electric Jungle Juice, the Mad Gim Bridging t-shirt and the new Peten Stela walking short - available in March 2010)

Crashed a fancy dinner held by a golf apparel company.

Drove home in time to see a sunset through my bug stained windshield.

See. No time for just kicking back and writing ridiculously long blog posts. So you have to suffer through this one.

Speaking of suffering.

*************************************
MAD GRINGOS IN THE NEWS
*************************************
Naps may increase your income earning potential:
Third of adults take naps
Yes, it's a blatant mis-reading of the survey results, but Mad Gringo was just happy they found people who take naps may actually hold jobs.

This guy probably doesn't take naps:
Robber of local motel sought
We've had a rash of Hawaiian shirt clad robbers. Must mean the economy is about to recover.

Even the old guys are getting into the act:
Elderly man tries to rob San Diego bank
That's what Mad Gringo has to look forward to. Being exhausted while trying to escape with the loot.

And yes, I did try to find pictures to go with the articles. No luck.

I did find the Chanhassen, MN Mad Gringo 4th of July Street Party Poster lying around:

*************************************
THE MISSING MAD GRINGO PICTURES
*************************************
Doesn't this look like fun?

They made every man get a Mad Gringo shirt before they could come into the party. It looks like a big time was had by all and then they marched down to the street dance. It must have been a glorious sight!

Reminds me of a vision I had.

*************************************
DANCE WITH MAD GRINGO
*************************************
Does it look like there's a lot going on the Mad Gringo world?

We're in almost 200 stores now. There are a dozen half-crazed Mad Gringo Dance Squad members that are wandering the streets and finding more outlets for us to partner with. We have a studly fulfillment team and the best looking ex-Greg Norman golf apparel designer on the planet working with us.

Now we just need a little cash and an unbelievably talented operations/merchandising guru to help move me closer to focusing 100% of my energies researching an unfinished manuscript, "The World's Top 100 Beaches to Nap On".

If you know someone that wants to put their hard earned money into the Go Slow cause, let me know. If you know someone that can pore over spreadsheets and dream up multivariate data analysis scenarios but lists Coen Brothers movies as their favorites, let me know.

Tell them Mad Gringo needs to find more dancers. (I'd find them myself, but I'm lazy.)

*******************************
SALIDA
*******************************
I forgot to add that I went to Salida, CO too. Salida. Exit. Good way to end this thing.

Speaking of endings. If you've read down this far, you deserve a break.

How does 25% off anything on the Mad Gringo website sound?

Here's how you do it. Add whatever you want into your shopping cart and then during checkout use this code:

GOSLOW

It's good through the weekend (9/27/09) and will put our studly fulfillment team to the test. Because they smell good in addition to knowing how to warehouse and ship.

And that brings us to the end. That is all I have for you this time. Thanks for the read. Now, back to work.

Go slow.

MG