Greetings!
I'm still here. Just a little dizzy from the recirculated air in those metal canisters that hurl me through the air at 500 mph. I need to fix that Slow Rover and stick to the ground.
In this note, your questions answered:
* Where have you been, Mad Gringo?
* Why is your brain so big?
* Do you have any new stuff?
* Can we get something for free?
* The end.
Now that we're on the same page, let's get started.
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WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN, MAD GRINGO?
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Funny you should ask. I have been hanging out in trade show booths. I bought a cool little bamboo tiki bar from a nice lady on Craigslist and I've been touring around the country with it.
First stop, Orlando:
That was good. That was fun. Everything was new. Tiki bar in good shape. Bar stools able to hold a grown man's body weight.
Then I went to Phoenix. It was good. It was fun. It rained. We were in a stadium. No tiki bar here. Just lots of kokopelli.
Then I went to Chicago. It was cold. It was fun. My booth was on a corner. The re-asembly process of the tiki bar led to some pieces of bamboo wandering off. Bar stools weakened but still able to hold a grown woman's weight.
Then I went to Vegas. It was warm. It was fun. I had a drink spilled on me by Flavor Flav. Here's the view from inside the tiki bar.
Note that you can't see the bar stools. They are still with me, but can barely hold the weight of a gradeschooler. The tiki bar took a blow when someone leaned on it too.
On top of that I had to pass the time looking at some terrible suits. Mad Gringo hates suits.
Now I'm back in Omahahu for a week before heading up to Minneapolis. I'll bet it's cold there.
I loved the bamboo tiki bar so much that I bought a new booth for the trade shows. It's a cantina. With real stools. Able to withstand multiple builds and tear downs.
I know. You're jealous.
All these trips are the reason I've lost touch. I apologize. I'll visit next time.
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WHY IS YOUR BRAIN SO BIG?
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I get asked this one all the time.
It was a mystery to modern medicine, but now it's been explained by the mensas at UCal Berkeley.
So, as the article says: Bring back the siesta! Let's get some learnin'!
(I added that last part. It's my newsletter.)
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(I added that last part. It's my newsletter.)
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DO YOU HAVE ANY NEW STUFF?
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Every day. New stuff every day.
Check out the site now because we have the world's greatest shirt: the Electric Jungle Juice.
(You all know how that one ends)
Plus the best short ever because it has Mad Gim printed on the inside pockets.
Girls love that.
Grab these shirts before summer ends. Once we sell them out, they are gone, daddy, gone.
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CAN WE GET SOMETHING FOR FREE?
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It always comes down to the free stuff, doesn't it? Heck, most of you probably just skipped here to see what the free offer is.
I love that.
This weekend has Mad Gringo giving you all 15% off any Mad Gringo purchase. Expires on Sunday 2/28/10.
(I tried the free shipping thing again, but that wasn't working. 15% is better as long as you spend $100 or live in Iowa.)
(think about that)
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THE END
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All good things come to an end. Especially this email.
I tried to be brief and buried the offer somewhere deep in the note just to annoy my marketing advisors. They're not fans of that.
Hey, speaking of fans, we're almost up to 500 fans on Facebook.
Halfway to my vanity URL. I'm easy.
That's all I have for you. You're free to roam around now.
That's all I have for you. You're free to roam around now.
I say head out for coffee. You can hang around there for quite some time before you'll be missed. Sad but true.
Oh, and tell one of your bosses today that whatever they are proposing is a "great idea". Don't debate it, don't offer to do anything with it, just compliment them on it. Then go on with your day.
It's all part of my master plan.
Go slow.
MG
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