Beyond the Oyster Juice

Don't mess with the Tiki

When you get one of these in the mail, consider it a warning:

I laughed when I opened the package from Mad Jeff - after all, it looks harmless enough - just a little tiki guy and a drum. MJ tried to warn me - "he looks a little angry" he said.

What could go wrong? I was headed to see those 80s superstars, the Police and Elvis Costello. The sun was shining. The tiki guy was playing music. I wasn't driving. Things were looking up.

I bumped into Mad Steve and crew at the bar. He was looking resplendent in his Tikal Tour Go Slow shirt. He bought me a few beverages.

I saw Elvis Costello. He rocked. I saw tons of people I knew. They bought me some beverages.

Then I saw the Police. (sorry for the low quality video)

Yes, that was G-money belting out the lyrics along with Sting as I was consuming another beverage.

He even got the ladies next to us to sing along - after they bought me another beverage.

That's when things got a little fuzzy.

There was a convention.  A conventioneer. Adult beverages. Talk of golf. A belly dancer:

And a late night run for the border.

When I came to, this was staring at me in the mirror.

 

I guess he does look a little angry.

At least I have this quote from Frank Sinatra to pull me through:

"I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day."

Amen brother.

Go slow.

Hawaiian Shirts at the Opera

Mad Gringo was referred to this comic on Chris Muir's Day By Day website:

(comic from http://www.daybydaycartoon.com/2008/05/12/)

I love it. Hawaiian Shirts at the Opera.

I'm told it's a depiction of Bob Shrum, not an indictment that Hawaiian shirts are only worn by fat, balding men.

Mad Gringo likes to think that hip guy in the tux has a few Go Slow shirts in his closet. I know Madeline Albright does.

Go slow.

Keeping up with the Joneses

There is always a Bigger Truck.

Mad Gringo knows this feeling all too well.

It's what nearly drove him to live in a hut on the beach.

I may still end up there. Check out this article on Forbes from Neil Steinberg:

Running After The Joneses

(found thanks to Beach Walks with Rox)

The article captures the tug that defines the inner Mad Gringo. How much is enough? Why can't I just be happy on a beach learning Spanish and studying the works of Carlos Fuentes? If my parents grew up in a 1000 square foot home, why do I need more?

If Hilo Hattie has the World's Largest Hawaiian Shirt, how hard would it be for Mad Gringo to build one even bigger?

Nap time.

Feel free to comment!

And check out the Reef - a community forum put together by the Beach Walks with Rox Team.

She has a great outrigger canoe video up from last week. I copied it here.

Beach Walk 632 - Island Adventure

Let that serve as inspiration for the Kent Island Outrigger Canoe Club festivities this coming weekend!

Aloha!

Go slow.

Find your way to the beach, for FREE

Want to get to the nearest beach?

Just need to find your way there?

What about a FREE Rand McNally Road atlas?

Click here.

Before you go, make sure to pick up some beachwear.

Go slow.

Worst Father's Day Gift Ever

From the Newsletter: Greetings Mad Gringo wants to know what the worst Father's Day gift is. Ever. This can be something you've received, given, heard rumors about, or just made up. I just read this article - World's worst gifts for world's best Dad and I knew you would come up with some good stuff if I just asked.  I'll be putting all my t-shirts on sale this weekend. It will probably be another coupon since I can't work my own website, but you'll be able to save some green. The new pictures are up (thanks to Mad Stephanie's mad skillz) and you can see what the shirts really look like now. Technology. So, send me a note describing bad Father's Day gifts. I want to laugh. Go slow. Mad Gringo PS:  I know I missed a sale for Mother's Day. I'm bad. To make it up to you, any order placed today or tomorrow will be upgraded to arrive via USPS priority on Saturday at no charge. The website has nothing on this promotion, so you'll have to trust me. I'll treat you right.

The only things missing are you and beachwear

It's been a while since I have visited Beachwalks with Rox for my daily dose of aloha.

She never disappoints.

Check it out.

Beach Walk 631 - Interlude

Get some beachwear.

Go slow.

John McCain Discovers Hawaiian Shirt Magic

(image from johnmccain.com - kind of)

Mad Gringo loves hearing stuff like this.

It looks like the McCain team used to have a strong superstitious streak that ran through it.

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-srv/WPcap/2000-02/19/067r-021900-idx.html

(I'll admit, I'm about 8 years late on this news)

His old staffers used to wear lucky purple suits, lucky ties, lucky khaki socks with palm trees on them and it was noted that "Murphy should bring out his magic Hawaiian Shirt". (I wonder if it was this one?)

See, even those that wish to be the leaders of the free world aren't immune to the magical Hawaiian shirt.

Mad Gringo operatives haven't heard if Mr McCain's team is employing similar measures this election season. But they're on it.

Go slow.

Photo Contest Montage

The end is here for the first Mad Gringo Photo Contest.

Good stuff.

The categories:
1. in a hammock
2. at a baseball game
3. with your favorite bartender
4. playing golf
5. stalking Jimmy Buffett (or at least getting his autograph for MG)

Winners can come from any category.

1. In a hammock



(she missed the hammock)

2. At a Beisbol game


(no MG, just A-Rod striking out)

3. With your favorite bartender

(pre-hammock)

4. Playing Golf

(none submitted)

5. Stalking Jimmy Buffett



(yes, they are a pirates - born just a little too late)

6. The un-mentioned Freestyle Category





(yes, she's touching an old statue's buttox)

(not really submitted, these ladies just look like they're having fun)

And that was it! Great stuff. 
(Mad Jeff's picture keeps showing up because those women are just so beautiful. That, and I forgot about the picture when picking winners, so it makes me feel better and a smile at the same time)

Contest Winners announced in the newsletter.

(Don't subscribe? Start by finding the link at left and entering your email address!)

Go slow.

Start Over

(image from Ross the intern's Blog at NBC)

While many will question taking advice from a Hawaian Shirt designer, Mad Gringo continues to offer these pearls of wisdom in an effort to alleviate the various global crises that afflict us.

Today's advice:

Start Over.

Bad hair, bird poop, missed deadlines, late to meetings, door dings, memo from the boss, traffic, no clean work shirts, spilled coffee - the morning is full of pitfalls. When these minor annoyances gang up on you and turn that smile upside down, Mad Gringo says: start over.

The research team at the Mad Gringo Institute in Key West have found no written rules against declaring a start over so it must be legal.

Not sure how to start over? Here are some suggestions from Mad Gringo.

Start walkin'. Make a beeline toward the bathroom and then just keep going right out the door. The longer the walk the better. Break a little sweat and take in all the wonders that nature or your local office park has to offer.

Grab another coffee. Make sure it's from a coffee shop that's a block or two away. While you're at it, get a People Magazine. You can spend some time imagining the editors arguing over which heart warming tale of underdogs overcoming adversity goes in each issue. Sniff.

Take a nap. (you saw this one coming, didn't you?) Head down to the lactation room and shut the door or find the nearest Barnes and Noble. 30 minutes tops. As you emerge from your light slumber feeling a bit groggy, just pretend that it's a new day.

Simple suggestions from a simple mind.

 

Go slow.

(side note - as I wrote this the first time at 8am, my computer froze and I lost everything. . .so I had to follow Mad Gringo's advice. . .start over indeed)

World's Most Expensive Flip Flop

No, it's not April Fools day again.

http://blog.madgringo.com/2008/04/worlds-most-exp.html

Mad Gringo's friends at PecheBlu have really built the World's Most Expensive Flip Flops. And you can order them today! Check out their press release:

PêcheBlu Launches World’s Most Expensive Flip Flops

For Immediate Release

April 29, 2008 – New York City – PêcheBluTM today announced the launch of its line of luxury crocodile flip flops, which will be the most expensive production flip flops in world. Called PêchePlatinum, they will retail for $400 per pair on the company’s website, www.pecheblu.com and at exclusive stores.

PêchePlatinum uses PêcheBluTM’s patent pending ultra-sports shoe base with hand-matched crocodile straps for magnificent comfort. These ultimate flip flops are for those who want to express their individuality in a world of mass production.

PêchePlatinum apply sports shoe design to flip flops, utilizing thick cushioning, solid arch support, and superior traction married to the freedom of a flip flop strap. The footwear offers athletes a competitive advantage by reducing the foot fatigue of traditional slab, flat flips flops, which cause foot, knee and lower back problems.

“Our customers lead active lives and not only appreciate luxury but also the importance of good support for their feet, which is impossible with traditional flip flops, said PêcheBlu’s CEO, Stephen Cohodes.

“Our customers wanted more flip flop luxury and crocodile worked perfectly to add quiet elegance, which is the essence of our footwear,” he added.

PêcheBluTM’s flip flops are gaining a following among those who recognize superior comfort and design from their knowledge of athletic shoes.

The Company’s designer, who had previously worked for New Balance and Tod’s, applied state-of-the-art athletic shoe technology to create PêcheBluTM’s specially molded curves that fit the human foot both front to back and side to side. The Z-FLEX sole moves with the musculature of the foot while subtle edge walls keep toes from sliding off. Grooved antibacterial uppers make it easier for the foot to grip the shoe with each step while the arch support reduces foot fatigue.

PêchePlatinum initial colors are: Vermillion Lacquer, Burnt Caramel, Black Platinum (shown), Jean Blue, Yacht Vermillion Lacquer, Yacht Blue, and Yacht White, all of which can be seen on the Company’s website, www.pecheblu.com. PêcheBluTM also will produce custom colors for specialty retailers.

Only Approved Skins

Using only crocodile skins approved for international trade, PêcheBluTM provides an economic incentive to save crocodiles from extinction. PêcheBluTM is also donating 5% of each pair sold to groups working to prevent primates, the closest animal relatives to humans, from becoming extinct. PêcheBlu is the first company to use eco-economics to protect one endangered species by sales of another and provide economic incentives to save both.

“Before we started using crocodile, we wanted to ensure we were not encouraging poaching or putting pressure on an animal that recently came off the endangered species list,” Mr. Cohodes explained. “We learned that crocodile farms require wild genetic contributions to maintain a healthy selection of farm-raised animals. It is our hope that we can contribute to conservation by providing an economic incentive to preserve crocodiles and their habitats in the wild, which also helps prevent extinction of many other species around them.” He added, “Since crocodiles can be man-eaters, you need a good reason not to shoot them on sight, particularly with skins in such high demand.”

You wondered how to use the Goverment's Economic Stimulus check that you received this week and now you know! Drop $400 of it on a new pair of flip flops from PecheBlu!

Maybe the World's Most Expensive Hawaiian Shirt isn't such a bad idea.

Go slow.